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Enter the Magazine Latest News
Warrant Wonderland: Framed by a Pink Haired Karen, Multiplied by Her Lies, and Still Active Thanks to the DA's Ego Epic Political Smackdown Sends Gavin Newsom Back to Hell! Residents Say They Wanna Beat Him Like a B*tch That Owes Them Money The Controversies Surrounding Stephen King’s Dark Themes and Public Persona Outrage on Campus in the Middle East: College Outages Amid the Chaos of the War in Iran Behold, The Great Golden State Heist: The Receipts Come Scorching In and They Reveal That Gavin Newsom Is In Deep Democratic Doo-Doo Why Let the Curry Commandos Cook Our Goose? A Fiery Plea for Flag-Waving Purity! Senator Elizabeth (Warrior Chief) Warren's Premium Panic: Blaming Billionaires for a Crisis Her Party Engineered Hakeem Jeffries: Shutdown Depression Survivor or Just the Guy Who Forgot to Pack the Gosh Darn Parachute? Zohran Mamdani's Socialist Mirage Shatters: "Free" Stuff Comes With a Hefty Price Tag – And He's Already Billing You The Reptilian Unveiling: Hillary Clinton, the Firmament Crack, and President Trahan's Survival Story Warrant Wonderland: Framed by a Pink Haired Karen, Multiplied by Her Lies, and Still Active Thanks to the DA's Ego Epic Political Smackdown Sends Gavin Newsom Back to Hell! Residents Say They Wanna Beat Him Like a B*tch That Owes Them Money The Controversies Surrounding Stephen King’s Dark Themes and Public Persona Outrage on Campus in the Middle East: College Outages Amid the Chaos of the War in Iran Behold, The Great Golden State Heist: The Receipts Come Scorching In and They Reveal That Gavin Newsom Is In Deep Democratic Doo-Doo Why Let the Curry Commandos Cook Our Goose? A Fiery Plea for Flag-Waving Purity! Senator Elizabeth (Warrior Chief) Warren's Premium Panic: Blaming Billionaires for a Crisis Her Party Engineered Hakeem Jeffries: Shutdown Depression Survivor or Just the Guy Who Forgot to Pack the Gosh Darn Parachute? Zohran Mamdani's Socialist Mirage Shatters: "Free" Stuff Comes With a Hefty Price Tag – And He's Already Billing You The Reptilian Unveiling: Hillary Clinton, the Firmament Crack, and President Trahan's Survival Story

The Funnies Forge

Squeal or No Squeal • Valentine's Massacre Edition • May 2, 2026
Squeal or No Squeal • Valentine's Massacre Edition
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Merica Says • Yeehaw or Bust • May 1, 2026
Merica Says • Yeehaw or Bust
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Gentile Semite • Shabbos Shenanigans • April 18, 2026
Gentile Semite • Shabbos Shenanigans
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Pentagon Shenans • The Leak King • April 07, 2026
Pentagon Shenans • The Leak King
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About

Born in Alaska. Built to fight the machine. The full story.

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Editor

Chance Trahan — Editor-in-Chief & host of Sheriff Says.

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Dynamic Meme Generator. User-generated weaponry against the elites.

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Sheriff Says Podcast

Raw, unfiltered truth bombs. No corporate spin. Ever.

Frontline Dispatches

Conspiracy Theories, Targeted Individuals, Reptilian Agenda
My Son Bred as Fake Jesus Vessel: Targeted Mom Exposes Draco Reptilian Extermination Plot & False Savior Script Apr 27, 2026

My Son Bred as Fake Jesus Vessel: Targeted Mom Exposes Draco Reptilian Extermination Plot & False Savior Script

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Targeted Individuals, Generational Satanism, Energy Harvesting
It's Always The Ones Closest To You: Understanding Handlers, Energy Harvesting, and Family Gaslighting Patterns Apr 24, 2026

It's Always The Ones Closest To You: Understanding Handlers, Energy Harvesting, and Family Gaslighting Patterns

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Spiritual Awakening, Inner Divinity, Suppressed History
The Inner Divine Power and the Buried Truth: Yahusha's Oneness, Giants, Dragons, and the Mud Flood Reset Apr 23, 2026

The Inner Divine Power and the Buried Truth: Yahusha's Oneness, Giants, Dragons, and the Mud Flood Reset

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Biblical Prophecy, Fallen Angels & Watchers, End-Times Awakening
The Case of the Fallen Angels: From the Ancient Biblical Rebellion to Stern End-Times Warnings Apr 21, 2026

The Case of the Fallen Angels: From the Ancient Biblical Rebellion to Stern End-Times Warnings

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Celebrity Culture, Occult Symbolism, Spiritual Warnings
The Hidden Toll of Stardom: Celebrities Open Up About Soul-Selling Deals and the Sacrifices That Came With Fame Apr 18, 2026

The Hidden Toll of Stardom: Celebrities Open Up About Soul-Selling Deals and the Sacrifices That Came With Fame

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Social Security, Disability Benefits, SSI Reform
SSI: Barely Surviving on $994 a Month – A National Shame That Demands Immediate Action from Washington Apr 15, 2026

SSI: Barely Surviving on $994 a Month – A National Shame That Demands Immediate Action from Washington

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→ See every dispatch in the archive

Chance Trahan

From the Desk of Chance Trahan

Editor-in-Chief • Alaskan Capital News

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