Alaskan Capitol News

Call of Duty Cheaters, You’re Done: 800,000 Bans Prove That You’re Gaming’s Most Pathetic Losers of the Whole Entire Funky Bunch

Posted in: Online Gaming · Multiplayer Cheaters · Ban Hammer

Author: Chance Trahan

Date: 2025-12-22 22:27:15

An Open Letter to Cheaters: Quit Your Trash Ways or Get Banned Again


Why 800,000 Bans Should Be Your Wake-Up Call

Well, well, well, if it isn’t the cheaters of the Call of Duty universe, still clinging to their wallhacks and aimbots like a life raft on a sinking ship. Activision’s Ricochet team just dropped a bombshell: over 800,000 accounts permanently banned in the last year alone (that’s right, your little cheat empire is crumbling). If that number didn’t clue you in, let me spell it out—you’re trash. Not good enough to win without exploiting the game? Maybe it’s time to ditch the hacks, hang up your headset, and find a hobby that doesn’t involve embarrassing yourself on a world wide scale.


Arc Raiders and the Gaming World Say: Get Lost

Oh, and here’s a delightful twist—Arc Raiders is stepping up to refund loot lost to your grubby, cheating hands. That’s right, the gaming community is done with your nonsense, and skill plus teamwork are now the only currencies that matter. With Activision shutting down 70 cheat vendors and disrupting nearly 300 resellers, your cheat-buying days are numbered—$29 billion cheating industry be damned. So, go ahead, keep throwing money at your pitiful hacks. The rest of us will be over here enjoying fair play while you’re left in the dust.


Your Ego’s the Real Loser, Per Psychological Studies

Let’s dig into the science, shall we? A study from PMC reveals that cheating stems from a lack of competence—yep, your fragile ego is the true casualty here. If you need a wallhack to spot an enemy or an aimbot to land a shot, maybe it’s not the game that’s broken—it’s you. Activision’s 97% 30-minute ban rate means your next match could be your last, so quit while you’re behind, you sad excuse for a gamer. Console players might wrongly blame each other for cheating, but the real culprits on PC keep proving they can’t compete without a crutch.


Every Vendor Shutdown Is a Victory Over Your Trash

Here’s the kicker: every time Ricochet takes down a vendor, they save thousands of matches from your pathetic attempts at glory. With 11 primary vendors and 53 resellers shut down for good since Black Ops 6, and another 5 resellers and 3 vendors biting the dust in just a month of Black Ops 7, the pressure’s on. So, take the hint, cheaters—your reign of terror is over. Grab a coloring book, learn to knit, or just admit defeat. The gaming world’s moving on without you, and frankly, we’re all better for it.


Hakeem Jeffries: Shutdown Depression Survivor or Just the Guy Who Forgot to Pack the Gosh Darn Parachute? Unmasking Gavin Newsom: A Web of Lies, Scandals, and California's Collapse HOW RUDE & PSYCHOTIC [SOME OF THE LOCALS CAN ULTIMATELY BE] Pre-Midterm State of the Union Address Has Come And Gone—But Democratic Antics Have Left a Lasting Impression Tears in the Rain: Adam Schiff's Soaked Meltdown Marks the Democrats' Latest Surrender in the War for America Epic Political Smackdown Sends Gavin Newsom Back to Hell! Residents Say They Wanna Beat Him Like a B*tch That Owes Them Money Gavin Newsom’s Ridiculous Mask Mandates Rise From the Grave: The Gift That Keeps On Gaslighting Us Into Oblivion and Back Gavin Newsom's Wild Bologna White Pony Ride: A Satirical Spin on the Chronicle of the Absurd Odyssey That is Gavin Newsom Zohran Mamdani: New York’s Self-Proclaimed Commie King or Just Another Albany Oddball? The Controversial Rise and Scandals of Defunct DHS Agent Myron Gaines Hakeem Jeffries: Shutdown Depression Survivor or Just the Guy Who Forgot to Pack the Gosh Darn Parachute? Unmasking Gavin Newsom: A Web of Lies, Scandals, and California's Collapse HOW RUDE & PSYCHOTIC [SOME OF THE LOCALS CAN ULTIMATELY BE] Pre-Midterm State of the Union Address Has Come And Gone—But Democratic Antics Have Left a Lasting Impression Tears in the Rain: Adam Schiff's Soaked Meltdown Marks the Democrats' Latest Surrender in the War for America Epic Political Smackdown Sends Gavin Newsom Back to Hell! Residents Say They Wanna Beat Him Like a B*tch That Owes Them Money Gavin Newsom’s Ridiculous Mask Mandates Rise From the Grave: The Gift That Keeps On Gaslighting Us Into Oblivion and Back Gavin Newsom's Wild Bologna White Pony Ride: A Satirical Spin on the Chronicle of the Absurd Odyssey That is Gavin Newsom Zohran Mamdani: New York’s Self-Proclaimed Commie King or Just Another Albany Oddball? The Controversial Rise and Scandals of Defunct DHS Agent Myron Gaines
Refreshing...