Act 1: Rooftop Rumors
On a sunny morning rooftop in the neighborhood, Snidely, the always-smirking frosted orange cat, lounges on the edge of a warm chimney, peering at the alley below. The neigborhood's wild creatures are frolicking about. Snider is licking his paws like he's counting money while looking down on the commoners.
SNIDER
Oh, goodness. Would you just look at that sloppy dumb bulldog, he's digging in the trash again. Downright disgusting! A proper animal should keep themselves clean.
He licks his front paws with exaggerated disdain.
SNIDER
Is that a pig? Why's he always flooping about in filth all day? Dreadful. How can anyone live like that? You've got to have standards, my good man.
Licks paws again, nose in the air.
SNIDER
Oh, it's the squirrel, hoarding all these nuts like a greedy miser. Sharing is caring, you know.
Another paw lick, eyes narrowed.
SNIDER
Honestly, this neighborhood is going to the dogs.
Nearby kids playing keep away throw a shiny old mirror on the rooftop near Snider the cat.
SNIDER
Oh! What is this? A gift from the heavens?
Snider struts his way over to the mirror, and starts sniffing it cautiously. The sun's reflection makes him squint his eyes. He determines it means him no harm and he boastfully approaches the mirror with great pride.
Act 2: Reflection Revelation
Snidely walks in front of the mirror. His fur is matted and covered in chimney soot and alley dust. He starts grooming himself frantically.
SNIDER
Oh no! My fur is a disaster! What a dirty mess!
He starts licking his chest desperately.
SNIDER
Lick-lick here. Lick-lick there. I can't let anyone see me!
He starts licking his sides and belly fur in a frenzy.
SNIDER
All that judging others… look at me! I'm a total mess!
The neighborhood animals start laughing as Snidely grooms furiously.
PIG
Hey Snidely, why so sloppy?
SNIDER
(licks) Quiet, you! (licks-licks) I'm fixing that!
BULLDOG
(grunts) You're looking insecure there, buddy.
SNIDER
(freezes) Oh, it's no use.
Snider storms off and falls into the chimney. The animals laugh. The pig falls over in the mud.
RAVEN
Moral of the story? Don't judge so harshly if you aren't choosing to live up to the same standards.
