January 12, 2026
Welcome back to Merica Says, ya bunch of rednecks! We're down to the wire. The Freedom Friers are leadin' this race by 500, but the Lucky Stoners left two blanks on the board. Time to steal. Listen up, Jack. We asked Merica: "When the barbecue runs out, the party is…" There's an "O" and a "D" up there. Do you think you can pull them down off the board? Sure you can. You've got this!
Over!
That's right! Boy, y'all are in some deep mess now, Stoners. But, y'all do still got a shot at the bonus round. That is, unless the Freedom Friers can steal it from you right now. Freedom Friers, if y'all can steal it, then you're going to the bonus round and the Stoners can suck it. There's just one more up there and it's a "D". What do you think it is?
Dinner?
Nope. Wrong. Anybody in the audience know it?
Done! Idiot!
Now now, pardner… we don't call folks idiots on this show. Even if they miss an easy one. But… yeah, it's "done." Freedom Friers, y'all are done. Lucky Stoners advance to the $15,000 bonus round. Yee-haw!
Round 1: One word. "America runs on…" D_____.
Dunkin'!
Round 2: Two words. "The only thing better than freedom is… F______ and F___.
Friends! Food!
Round 3: Three words. "Nothing says 'Merica' like a big ol'… G__, T____ and an A__.
Yeah, we're skippin' that.
Sometimes it's better to save that one for last.
Final round: Four words. "When in doubt, just add…" B___, M____, G____ and F______
Bacon!
Beer!
Girls!
Money!
Fishing!
Now, don't you go gettin' too excited. You've still gotta go back and clean that skipped one up. You've got 42 seconds left on the clock.
Alright.
Ready? Three words left. "Nothing says 'Merica' like a big ol'… G, T and A.
Gun!
Truck!
Apple?
Audience, can you help 'em out?
Ass! Idiot!
Easy now, friend… bless your heart. There's no need for any name-callin. But yeah… nothin' says Merica like a big ol "Ass". Tough break, Stoners. Y'all fought hard. But, no $15,000 today… That's it for Merica Says! Til next time. Yeehaw!